Alcohol is a depressant-a numbing agent. Alcohol caused more deaths in 2020 than Covid did. If you think alcohol is just a part of life, you are part of the problem, not the solution for the health & healing for yourself and the Collective. Growth happens outside our comfort zone. Even if you don't consider yourself an alcoholic that doesn't mean that alcohol has not played a role in who you are today. This carcinogen has been a part of society for so long that we have al been brainwashed. Alcohol is such a big part of society that it is the only drug you have to justify not partaking in socially. You don't have to call yourself an 'alcoholic' to have 'issues' with it or for alcohol to have a negative impact on your health.
For me, I grew up without a father because mine had become an alcoholic (ie; he checked out of life entirely) and my mother choose (consciously or unconsciously) to breed with that soul. The result of their life choices came me. Ever since I can remember I have had gut problems. I was taking papaya enzyme pills at age 10. Fortunately my grandfather made fermented foods like sauerkraut, pickles, wine, and more and encouraged a healthy gut microbiome with us all living off the land. He also was a raging, angry, mentally ill and manipulative person at times. As I sit here writing on Father's Day, I am grateful for all of it. Why? ...because it taught me to overcome great challenges and adversity in my life which has carved me into a very resilient person. However, I acknowledge the little girl who did not receive the foundational elements of nurturance from her own father that likely contributed to the physical and emotional depletion of self worth resulting in gut problems early on. I acknowledge the strong self confident woman I have become through diligent self healing. This acknowledgement alone can bring healing from the underlying shame of not coming from a 'good home' that society often projects is necessary. Trust me, even the most 'perfect' families have dysfunction. We as a society need to celebrate healing and overcoming ignorance and the fact that one must traverse valleys to fully reach the peaks in life. You don't just automatically find deep compassion and empathy or self forgiveness. You must navigate through deep realizations to truly evolve consciously. Can you find deep states through bliss and joy? ..Yes, but you cannot truly experience Light without the dark. You have not lived until you have crawled in the depths of hell and come out the other side stronger. In intensive yoga therapy training I studied about the 5 layers of being we all have as humans:
Each of these layers affect the other. We are complex yet very simple energetic eternal beings having a perceived temporary experience living in states of illusion that affect our ability to perceive reality...So what IS reality? Apparently it is what we think it is, yet if in denial, the nagging knife of truth can eat a hole right through your actual stomach, cause the reaction of alcoholism, or the codependent enabling behaviors that can support it.
Perhaps you walked on eggshells around a parent or were abandoned completely by one or both of your parents. You are not damaged, nor do you need to be fixed. However, digest this --We all have been subject to trauma whether it be capital T trauma or little t trauma and it affects our subconscious and these unconscious patterns of thought and behavior affect our gut and the microflora that reside in it that subsequently affecting our emotions. Imagine you were brought up in a house where you were not allowed to express your opinion or have a voice or you'd be mocked, shamed, threatened, or beaten? Would it not be surprising that a person might marry a man that would not have a strong voice of his own and become an alcoholic to avoid processing his own personal pain for not getting enough of his own fathers attention or approval? Might it not seem strange that a young woman might seek the grounding of a healthy male presence so much that she tolerates and enables this behavior, not being listened to or acknowledged by someone incapable of doing the work? Perhaps becoming an alcoholic gave the other person the opportunity to be the enabler because that person witnessed codependent and abusive behavior their whole life. This type of music playing in the background of marriage (*regardless of what society thinks from the outside) wears away at the soul of the relationship, resulting in unhappiness, unfulfillment, and eventual divorce...hence why divorce rates are so high and the topic of healing so vital. Healing doesn't come through blame, nor shame. Healing trauma and healing the gut proves not only the gut/brain connection but the necessity of addressing both together. Alcohol stops the buck from either happening. Just because you are comfortable doesn't mean you are healthy. Being depressed is not comfortable, it is comfortably numb. Have you faced your fears? Do you feel brave? Do you have the capacity to hold space for others or can you not because you cannot for yourself? Do you have strong boundaries and positive self talk? These are questions to ask yourself on the healing journey called Life.
In a world that glamorizes alcohol, a known carcinogen and depressant, you have to be willing to step out of society's denial of alcohol ruining relationships (starting with self) and consider how this issue relates to the epidemic proportion of gut problems in our society, ie; unresolved trauma. Truth is, each of our own nervous systems have responded to and adjusted to said trauma. Research has proven folks who lived with daily trauma tend to be the ones with chronic gut and skin issues, not to mention mental disorders. IBS, Crone's, Celiac, Sibo, hemorrhoids, bloating, and unbalanced gut microflora are just some of the symptoms that's cause links back to trauma. Add in alcohol and it becomes a recipe for depression and even suicide. The narcissistic person often goes around harming person after person, taking what they think they need, due to their unresolved wounds. Hurt people hurt people. Chronic gut issues in a boozy culture...It takes real bravery to feel your own feelings and step out of being the victim, saying no to abuse just as much as victim shaming happens amongst the unhealed. We are creatures of comfort, seeking what's 'familiar' (key word for 'family'..oftentimes can mean unhealed). When that behavior feels more familiar than the alternative, you can see why many people stay stuck and never transform their subconscious nor their gut flora resulting in disease and frankly why we still see so much 'un-evolved' CORE beliefs in society such as the gaslighting that happens around alcohol. Example: 'Oh, you don't drink? When did you become so boring?' “Come on, just one." 'I could never not drink, I wouldn't have any friends' (ie; gaslighting yourself).
You don't have to have experienced childhood trauma to be in need of healing. Perhaps you've experienced divorce, a job loss, death---I encourage you to not look for freedom in a bottle but in the power of transforming shame and grief and nurture your mind, heart, and gut instead. Show up for yourself in a way no one else has for you so you can change behaviors to support growth and freedom. Be your own best parent and remember when you are pointing your finger at the one who hurt you (or yourself for that matter)...there are four other fingers pointing back to remind you you have your own work to do in the form of forgiveness and releasing the dream of how you wished it could have been. Have the courage to feel, deal, and heal.
The microbiota communicate through our nervous system which in turn affects the immune system and the brain. There are neurons in the gut. Each of our nervous systems have responded differently to trauma...this explains why one child in the family is highly functioning and successful when another has dependency issues and no self drive. Dependency is not always alcohol, but alcohol is the most widely accepted in society. When you find yourself reaching for alcohol, even socially, consider the subconscious belief driving that behavior's thirst and what truly needs digesting. What might you actually need more of?,...connection perhaps, which alcohol doesn't ultimately bring. 90% of our serotonin (happiness hormone) is made by the gut flora, not the brain. When the microbiome is unhealthy it affects our ability to make good decisions and most of all — be happy! What is the biggest common denominator in a healthy microbiome?..Diversity! The bugs cannot thrive with an unhealthy mind. Transform your thoughts into ones that support health. Eat wildly fermented cultured foods daily. Feel your feelings.
Here are 3 Top Things you can do to create a Healthy microbiome, Heal trauma, and Transform your relationship with Alcohol:
1). Reduce stress by feeling your feelings and working through them. Journal, dance, tap, to breathe, read books, listen to podcasts, talk to therapists, coaches, get ketamine therapy, travel, do Ayahuasca, whatever it fucking takes... keep healing. Go into the fire as the only way TO is THROUGH. Own your own behaviors. Stop projecting your unprocessed wounds onto others and have the courage to say NO and walk away if others aren't on your vibe. Question and process. Respect yours and others journeys. Forgive.
2). Eat a high fiber, low sugar diet high in wildly fermented foods and drinks daily...lots of different cultures of culture. Travel! Get a dog. Breathe in nature. Diversify your microbiota. Use antibiotics with caution.
3). Consider if you have an alcohol dependency in any way or if you have enabled someone else's dependency and why you felt so unworthy to not have all of them or perhaps you had a need to feel needed which might have actually sabotaged their ability to own their own shit. Have any of your relationships been affected by society's denial around the toxicity of alcohol? Have you been silenced by an alcoholic because they were too busy blaming you for their dependency? This is deep collective work we all need to unpack around a substance that frankly has lost its luster as we all wake up and start drinking the right kind of kool-aid. Alcohol is so 2019.
At Ferm Fatale, our goal is to provide you with zero sugar wildly fermented alcohol replacements that give you the tools to celebrate life and nourish the mind, heart and gut.
Live Clean, Drink Dirty!
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