Self Love is about being your True Self

Self Love is about being your True Self - Ferm Fatale

There is a lot of talk about Self Love & Self Care these days. In a world full of distraction and responsibilities, the highest responsibility we have is to remember ourselves as an eternal spiritual being having a human experience and that we are divinely connected to a collective energy. Self Love in the spiritual sense is not just about exclusively focusing on ourselves, but realizing that in order to show up and be our best selves, we must fill our own cups first...and sometimes that means distancing ourselves from toxic people, even family. Are we perfect? No. Are we growing? If we allow ourselves to. In order to grow and evolve, we must allow new thoughts and perspectives in. As I always say, you cannot receive with a clenched fist. We must display authentic openness and be willing to listen to others feelings, experiences, and hold compassion for them as if we are them, not judging them for having feelings or by telling them their feelings aren’t valid just because we have never experienced something similar. The only people that I have ever had challenge this higher thought are people that view caring for yourself first as a selfish act. I can assure you, no one wants to be around someone that gives and gives selflessly until they collapse because they are not honoring themselves first. Jesus taught this lesson in the story of Martha. When we focus on being a good, honest, loving, compassionate, joy-filled person to ourselves first, we ARE of service to others. We are not in service when we cut ourselves off from our joy in order to be a martyr and then judge others for not doing or being enough. These judgments are projections of how that person truly feels about themselves— not enough. Remember the golden rule: What I think of myself is a reflection of me. What others think of me is a reflection of them.

Joy is an inner quality. When we allow it to shine, our life reflects true happiness and peace. Happiness does not depend upon outer circumstances but on our inner attitude, no matter what. This is why it is so important not to hate your story and to love all the parts of yourself. You can’t choose your beginning but you sure can write a new ending! Life is filled with setbacks, heartache, loss, and trauma. It is up to you to decide if those things make your heart shrink or expand. If there is something you don’t like, it is your response-ability to change it, no one else’s. Developing a self care routine that helps you to connect with your inner awareness of the qualities of joy and peace is key to experiencing the essence of your being. Happiness and Self Love are a result of your connections to your inner joy. Throughout the day, turn within to that place of joy instead of a seeming challenge so that when you respond positively or not at all, you are able to see the blessing and opportunity that life is giving you to choose happiness by truly being your most authentic Self. Here are 5 things that help me to practice being my most True Self:

1. Take time to feel, heal, and deal. This requires staying still and listening to what your soul needs. It doesn’t have to be some elaborate ceremony. You can just carve out 30 minutes of quiet to write down things that are on your mind and to process your feelings.

2. Live in presence. This means that throughout the day challenges, responsibilities, and thoughts will flood your mind, but you resist thinking about the past or the future and just experience the NOW, even if it’s not perfect.

3. Listen more. Yes, you are smart and have a lot to say, but try making listening a conscious decision. Notice how many times you want to interject. Resist the desire to do so and listen to both your inner dialogue and what you hear the other person saying. You will probably be quite surprised all that is there for learning.

4. Stay enthusiastic. Enthusiasm is contagious. Being excited about the little things and the big things keeps you in a vibration of abundance. Be the person that attracts the life you want by being grateful for what already is.


5. Everyday ask yourself “What would I love?” The reason why many folks don’t follow their bliss is because they are so bogged down by responsibility and then they wake up years later and are unhappy. Goals and dreams require sacrifice and putting in the work, yes, but if you are not continually taking personal audit, you might just be on auto-pilot and be cutting yourself off from the “more” that the power and presence inside of you is asking that you express.


Self Love is the real reason Ferm Fatale exists. I created this beverage from the heart to heal from the inside. Thank you for following me through this journey, Valentines. To share my gratitude with you, I'm offering you 20% off all Cosmo 6-packs through February 29. At checkout, just use the promo code: SELFLOVE. **Cannot be combined with any other offer. 

Shop and Save Here!


Back to blog

Leave a comment

Please note, comments need to be approved before they are published.